My name is Professor Augustus S.F.X. Van Dusen. I am a very intelligent man, with five degrees ranging from New York to California. I have a very big head, but you know what they say about big heads. Big brains.
I asked for my shoes to be polished before entering the cell, and this helped me to write the letters to trick the warden.
Hello, my name is Augustus S.F.X. Van Dusen. I am a very intelligent man, with a high paying jobs and degrees ranging in various subjects. I have attended top notch Ivy League universities, such as Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, and Columbia. I have achieved a Ph.D., an LL.D., an F.R.S., an M.D., and an M.D.S. I think very highly of myself because, well, I am the best...at everything. I am by far the most intelligent man I know and I can most definitely think my way out of any situation. A few of my acquaintances have tried to put me up to a challenge. They think that I can not escape a locked jail cell in seven days. I could achieve this task with my eyes closed. No task has ever tripped me up, and I do not suppose this will either. Think that I am pulling your leg? Think again.
What are my interests? What are my interests??? Well those are for me to know and you to find out. But if you must know...being the most intelligent man in the world.